30 Positive Affirmations for the Overthinking People Pleasers

positive affirmations on a notebook

Reciting positive affirmations is a great way to help tackle your nasty people-pleasing habit.

If you are someone who worries a lot about the best ways to make sure that everyone is comfortable around you and completely ignores your own needs in the process, having small personal reminders can slowly but surely help you break the habit.

Here are the tell-tale signs of a people pleaser:

  • You put everyone’s needs before your own: You are the caretaker in your friend group, the one who will always listen to your friend cry about her break-up that happened eight months ago even though it is emotionally draining for you and you should probably tell her that enough time has passed and she needs to move the f on!
  • You can’t say no to people: Are you always available for every plan with every person? When your friends want to go out partying on a Friday night, it’s hard for you to be THAT friend who would much rather stay home and catch up on her fav Netflix show after a long day (no matter how valid of a reason that is).
  • You avoid conflict like the plague: Do you struggle to speak up for yourself during disagreements? Do you cut everybody way too much slack in an effort to keep the peace? Do you get angry at your friends and family when they hurt your feelings in some way but you just can’t bring yourself to be upfront about it with them?

If you relate to these points, then you are a member of the people-pleasing club! But the good news is…you don’t have to stay there forever!

Why are positive affirmations awesome?

I like to think of positive affirmations as powerful reminders of either what is already true about myself that I may occasionally lose sight of OR what I eventually want to achieve in my life. It’s a way for me to effectively manifest my reality into existence through the power of words. This always helps me feel much more at peace and in control of my life.

By reciting these positive affirmations, you will be reminded why you don’t need to live your life on other people’s terms and why it’s important for you to put yourself first. Repeat them silently to yourself or in your head whenever you feel the urge to people-please! The more you do this, the more empowered you’ll feel to live a healthier, more authentic life.

Here are 30 positive self-affirmations for overthinking people-pleasers!

I. I validate myself.

2. My needs matter.

3. It is not up to me to cater to everybody’s needs.

4. My boundaries matter.

5. I will respect and honor my boundaries even if no one else will.

6. It is okay to say no.

7. Protecting my needs is a healthy thing for me to do.

8. I trust that other adults can handle rejection.

9. It is not up to me to solve the whole world’s problems.

10. I trust that other adults can manage their own problems themselves.

11. It is okay for people to be disappointed by me or my choices. Their disappointment does not define me or invalidate my choices.

12. Conflict is a healthy part of any relationship.

13. I am learning to have a healthy and safe relationship with conflict.

14. By handling conflict in a mature and safe way, my relationships will grow instead of suffer.

15. I deserve to speak up for myself.

16. My voice matters.

17. Silencing myself to keep the peace does not serve anyone.

18. I am learning to let go of my people-pleasing habits and live a life that’s more authentic to me.

19. It’s okay for me to want and value different things from other people.

20. My wishes, needs and values matter even if they don’t make sense to other people.

21. I am learning to pay more attention to my intuition.

22. I will no longer exhaust myself trying to take care of everybody else.

23. I can live with the disappointment of others.

24. I will no longer listen to any outside opinion that I know is not useful to me.

25. How I choose to live my life doesn’t have to make sense to anybody but me.

26. I can disagree with people and still have good relationships with them.

27. I am excited to follow my curiosity and my heart’s desires even if people disagree with where it leads me.

28. I no longer need people’s approval to feel validated.

29. I no longer need people’s approval to feel good about myself.

30. I live my life for me, not others.