Do you often wonder if you may be an overthinker?
We all worry about things sometimes. It’s part of the human experience.
This might be something as simple as deciding which cup of coffee to order. Or, something as major as deciding whether or not you should move to a different city because you feel the need for a change.
However, if you find yourself excessively worrying or ruminating about things and it stops you from living your life in a healthy way, then you may be struggling with overthinking.
What causes overthinking?
Overthinking occurs when you can’t stop thinking about the same things over and over again. Specifically, you may be running over on repeat in your mind past mistakes or embarrassing moments from days or even years ago.
Similarly, you may be unable to stop yourself from worrying about future events that haven’t happened yet or things that you have no control over. According to the Berkeley Well Being Institute, it consists of “a process of repetitive, unproductive thoughts.”
So, here are 5 telltale signs that you are an overthinker.
5 Telltale Signs That You’re An Overthinker
1. You can’t stop replaying past events in your head
A major sign that you are an overthinker is if you can’t stop ruminating and replaying past events and conversations in your head.
After a presentation at work or school, do you spend the rest of the day going over every single criticism or comment you got?
After you come home from a date, do you spend the rest of the night awake, going over the entire date, wondering if you said the right thing, the right way and whether or not your date thought the same?
You already know what’s in the past is in the past. It’s done! But you just can’t help yourself!
2. You delay making decisions
Often, we overthinkers don’t like to immediately make decisions. I mean why rush to make just any decision like whether or not you should break up with your manipulative boyfriend who is always mean to you, when you can make the absolute BEST, most well thought-out decision?!
At least that’s what we tell ourselves right?
To do that, you need to analyze every single aspect of the situation, gather enough evidence and outside input and give yourself ample time to properly reflect. In this example, that could be asking all your friends and family what they think, remembering all the good times with this person and trying to justify their behavior and give them the benefit of the doubt.
There’s nothing wrong with taking some time to think so you can make an informed decision. I’m actually a firm believer in this.
However, that’s not a luxury that you will always have in life. In this example, no amount of deliberating and analyzing will change the fact that your significant other is being a jerk to you. If trying to work things out and communicating your needs doesn’t work, there is a simple decision that you need to make (i.e: ending things with him).
You can’t make the perfect decision all the time. There are way too many things that could happen that you have absolutely no control over. But sometimes, any decision is better than no decision and you just have to learn to live with the outcome, whatever it may be.
If you find yourself procrastinating and always delaying big decisions, you are probably overthinking or overly worried about the situation. In that case, it’s helpful to reflect and ask yourself why.
3. You always ask for an outside opinion
You may also ask for a lot of people’s opinions. When you overthink, you overanalyze and reexamine everything. Many times, that also involves asking for the input of friends, family or maybe even strangers.
I’m all for asking for an outside opinion every once in a while. It can give you a fresh perspective and help you understand the different sides of a situation that you may not have been able to grasp before.
But if you find yourself always checking in with others before making decisions instead of listening to your inner voice and learning to trust yourself, then there’s a problem. That could be a sign that you are overthinking things just a teeny bit when really, it’s not that serious.
4. You immediately go to the worst-case scenario
Overthinking can occur in everyday, mundane situations. But these can quickly turn into very serious situations if you find yourself immediately going to the worst-case scenario.
Let me give you an example. You are invited to a party and you find a really cute outfit that you’re very excited to wear.
Oh, did I mention your crush is also going to be there? All the more reasons to look your best!
But, all of a sudden, you start to worry that once you get to the party, everybody will think that your outfit is horrible and they will single you out and laugh at you and publicly humiliate you. Everybody including your crush.
How will you ever be able to show your face outside after this??
You see what I mean?
This may sound a bit exaggerated to some people but this is a legitimate issue for many people out there and one that I’ve personally experienced before as well.
5. You are always tired
Are you always tired for no apparent reason?
You come home from school or work and you feel like you’ve run a legit marathon? Even though you are getting your recommended 7-9 hours of sleep, eating well and all that jazz, you still feel so exhausted all. The. freaking. Time!
This is not surprising if you are someone who thinks a lot and has an overactive mind. According to the Queensland Brain Institute, the human brain utilizes about 20% of your energy DAILY.
This is just for basic survival of an average adult on a normal day guys! Imagine how much energy it must use up when you are constantly overthinking. No wonder, you have so little energy!
6. You are never present
If you are always thinking and thinking some more, it goes without saying that you are living in your head.
When you are in your head, you are not present. When you are not living in the present moment, you are not aware of everything going on around you and you might be jumpy or slightly on edge whenever you receive stimuli from the outside world. For example, someone tapping you on the shoulder or an object dropping suddenly next to you.
I can’t tell you how many times my friends have told me about some funny thing that happened when we were hanging out at some point and I just don’t remember.
I know I was there but I have zero memory of what happened. That’s because even though physically I was there, mentally I wasn’t.
This is a feeling that we overthinkers know all too well.
How do I stop being an overthinker?
Great question!
Unfortunately, you won’t get over your overthinking overnight.
I’ll be honest, I still struggle with it every day. Nevertheless, here are some things that are pretty helpful in helping me manage this nasty habit. I hope they help you too!
1. Journaling
Start a journal now if you don’t have one already. It is a great way to clear your head and unload your mind when it gets filled with all sorts of thoughts.
It is a great stress reliever and can help you self-reflect and learn more about yourself along the way. If you don’t know how to even start journaling, check out my article with different prompts to help you get started.
2. Therapy
If you haven’t already, really consider seeking out a therapist.
Talking to a therapist can help you uncover the root of your overthinking. They can also help you come up with actionable ways to manage the habit so it doesn’t take over your life.
I started seeing a therapist a few years ago and it changed my life. It is one of the best decisions I have ever made and it has done wonders for my mental health.
3. Take care of your health
Start looking after your health and wellbeing and your mind will thank you.
Find a way to move your body that’s fun and sustainable so you can be consistent with it. Eat more of the food that’s nutritious and actually good for you.
And for crying out loud, start prioritizing your sleep!! According to Columbia Psychiatry News, poor sleep can have detrimental effects on one’s mental health including an inability to handle everyday stressors (thus resulting in more overthinking and anxiety).
4. Talk to a friend
Sometimes, all you need to get out of your head is a good ranting sesh with a trusted friend.
When you struggle with overthinking and anxious thoughts, it’s easy to feel like you are going through it alone. Like no one understands what you are dealing with.
That couldn’t be farther from the truth. You have family and friends who love you and would be more than willing to listen and support you through your struggles if you let them in.
Never forget that!
5. Cut yourself some slack
You won’t stop being an overthinker overnight. In fact, you may never fully stop. I still haven’t. But that’s no reason to beat yourself up because your mind likes to take you on a roller coaster of rumination and negative thoughts sometimes.
All you can do is be kind and patient with yourself and find small, simple ways to manage your overthinking every day so you can live a healthier, more peaceful life.
Final Thoughts
There you have it guys!
I’m not a medical professional. I’m just someone who overthinks just like you and has way too much personal experience with this. But thanks to this experience, I have found tips and tricks that help me manage my overthinking which is why I’m sharing this with you. I hope you found this post useful!
